just a lot fucked up

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So this is my EDNOS blog. I like thinspo. I reblog mostly. I'm a recovering cutter and this is my 5th relapse with EDNOS... But I've never been technically diagnosed...

Stats: hw: 155 cw: 135 lw: 114 gw1: 135 gw2: 125 ugw: 110ish, or whatever I feel beautiful as. If you want to talk, just message me :)

For the anon…
  • 1.Sexual orientation. curious


  • 2. What I’m really bad at. Not fucking up


  • 3. The one person whose arms I’d like to be in. They will remain un-named


  • 4. My best first date. Well ‘dates’ generally are just hanging out with my boyfriend but the most memorable one was a night picnic with Gaur and we stargazed. I love stargazing, and it was just really cute.


  • 5. A description of my self-esteem. Bipolar. I either want to kill myself cuz I hate myself that badly, or I’m ehhish with myself. Then there are the very rare days I feel like hot shit.


  • 6. Who my best friends are. Aish (well, she’s more my lover, but she’s also my bestest friend), Helena, Mari, Holly, Rachael, Gaur, Nick. Most people are from drumline actually… And then there’s school friends like Bevins and Abby and Aisha, but we’ve drifted some.


  • 7. My favorite book. And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie.


  • 8. Biggest turn-offs. uhhhhh not sexually: lack of good hygene. That’s a big one. Disrespect to my family. They might be bitchy and I hate them sometimes, but they’re still my family. Not liking animals. Idk why that one bothers me, but it does. That’s all I can really think of… Sexually: when the guy acts more like a girl. I HATE it.


  • 9. A description of my best friend. She’s amazing. Like. She would do damn near anything for me and I love her to bits.


  • 10. My favorite animal. Pandas are pretty cool, even though they’re too lazy to fuck…


  • 11. Someone I miss. My cousin Liam.


  • 12. The reason behind my last breakup. Oh wouldn’t you like to know. Nothing bad actually, I just didn’t want to be in a relationship for reasons involving my head and I’m afraid of getting too attached to someone again. I’m too dependent on other people so that’s kinda why.


  • 13. What I did yesterday. I played frisbee with Holly and a bunch of people and this really hot kid that I DON’T KNOW WHO HE IS!!!


  • 14. What my greatest achievement is. I’m a world champion for drumline. Get on my level.


  • 15. A description of the person I dislike most. I don’t really dislike anyone more than anyone else. There are a few people, but I can tolerate them and I can’t say I hate any of them.


  • 16. My 5 favorite songs right now. Rootless Tree- Damien Rice, This is Why We Fight- The Decemberists, Kill Everybody- Skrillex, Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop- Landon Pigg, Dog Days are Ove- Florence and the Machine


  • 17. How my last kiss went down. We are not discussing this one…


  • 18. What I find attractive in the preferred sex. Eyes. Teeth. Broad shoulders. Face in general… Smelling good…. Then there are the lame cute little things guys do that just make me happy.


  • 19. All of the pets I’ve ever had. Boris and Natasha were my first pets, they were cocker spaniels. Emma and Stella are my current dogs, they’re springer spaniels. I’ve also had a snail named Wally…


  • 20. Favorite flavor of ice cream. This is hard… I don’t really have a favorite. But if you find me something chocolate based with cookie dough, brownie and oreo in it, I will love you forever (figuratively, unless you are Aish, in which case I already do)
— 1 month ago with 3 notes
Anonymous asked: first 20


Answer:

This might take a while…

— 1 month ago
bufriedo:

green4pple:

1.Sexual orientation.
2. What I’m really bad at.
3. The one person whose arms I’d like to be in.
4. My best first date.
5. A description of my self-esteem.
6. Who my best friends are.
7. My favorite book.
8. Biggest turn-offs.
9. A description of my best friend.
10. My favorite animal.
11. Someone I miss.
12. The reason behind my last breakup.
13. What I did yesterday.
14. What my greatest achievement is.
15. A description of the person I dislike most.
16. My 5 favorite songs right now.
17. How my last kiss went down.
18. What I find attractive in the preferred sex.
19. All of the pets I’ve ever had.
20. Favorite flavor of ice cream.
21. The one place I want to be right now.
22. The meanest thing anyone has ever said to me.
23. Where I have lived before.
24. I’ll love you if…
25. What are my future plans?
26. An internal conflict I have with myself.
27. What I’m doing tomorrow.
28. What I want to be when I get older.
29. Most embarrassing moment.
30. Two of my insecurities.
31. What I would do if I won the lottery.
32. A description of the boy or girl I like.
33. What I love most about myself.
34. My biggest pet peeves.
35. What bands I’ve seen live.
36. How many kids I want in the future.
37. My idea of a perfect date.
38. What I’m really good at.
39. Most traumatic experience.
40. Where I would like to live.
41. The nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.
42. Do I like where I am now?
43. My relationship with my sibling(s).
44. All the pets I’ve ever had.
45. What I can hear right now.
46. My biggest worry currently.
47. Something I’ve wished for repeatedly.
48. My relationship with my parents.
49. Something I should have said a long time ago.
50. What my last text message says.
51. What I hate most about myself.
52. Biggest turn-ons.
53. What words upset me the most.
54. What I hate/hated the most about school.
ASK ME SHIT 

Go go go

bufriedo:

green4pple:

  • 1.Sexual orientation.
  • 2. What I’m really bad at.
  • 3. The one person whose arms I’d like to be in.
  • 4. My best first date.
  • 5. A description of my self-esteem.
  • 6. Who my best friends are.
  • 7. My favorite book.
  • 8. Biggest turn-offs.
  • 9. A description of my best friend.
  • 10. My favorite animal.
  • 11. Someone I miss.
  • 12. The reason behind my last breakup.
  • 13. What I did yesterday.
  • 14. What my greatest achievement is.
  • 15. A description of the person I dislike most.
  • 16. My 5 favorite songs right now.
  • 17. How my last kiss went down.
  • 18. What I find attractive in the preferred sex.
  • 19. All of the pets I’ve ever had.
  • 20. Favorite flavor of ice cream.
  • 21. The one place I want to be right now.
  • 22. The meanest thing anyone has ever said to me.
  • 23. Where I have lived before.
  • 24. I’ll love you if…
  • 25. What are my future plans?
  • 26. An internal conflict I have with myself.
  • 27. What I’m doing tomorrow.
  • 28. What I want to be when I get older.
  • 29. Most embarrassing moment.
  • 30. Two of my insecurities.
  • 31. What I would do if I won the lottery.
  • 32. A description of the boy or girl I like.
  • 33. What I love most about myself.
  • 34. My biggest pet peeves.
  • 35. What bands I’ve seen live.
  • 36. How many kids I want in the future.
  • 37. My idea of a perfect date.
  • 38. What I’m really good at.
  • 39. Most traumatic experience.
  • 40. Where I would like to live.
  • 41. The nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.
  • 42. Do I like where I am now?
  • 43. My relationship with my sibling(s).
  • 44. All the pets I’ve ever had.
  • 45. What I can hear right now.
  • 46. My biggest worry currently.
  • 47. Something I’ve wished for repeatedly.
  • 48. My relationship with my parents.
  • 49. Something I should have said a long time ago.
  • 50. What my last text message says.
  • 51. What I hate most about myself.
  • 52. Biggest turn-ons.
  • 53. What words upset me the most.
  • 54. What I hate/hated the most about school.

ASK ME SHIT 

Go go go

(Source: , via notcirclesbutspirals)

— 1 month ago with 63201 notes
invisibleuntilneeded asked: Just saying, that "<3" should actually say "lessthanthree."


Answer:

…Well uhhhhhh. Hi there?

— 1 month ago
Anonymous asked: You're beautiful <3


Answer:

Your proper usage of you’re made me happy. But I’m really not. But thank you for the thought. You’re a lovey person for being nice enough to take the time to try to brighten my day :) I ramble… Sorrys…

— 1 month ago
Do you feel lovely?

When you nearly pass out?
When your throat burns from purging?
When you tear yourself down in the mirror telling yourself it’ll make you stronger?

Do you? Is it worth it?

Damn straight. I’ll be fucking skinny and I’ll look back and I won’t regret a damn thing.

— 1 month ago with 3 notes
&#8230;pathetic&#8230; So fucking pathetic that you don&#8217;t need to bother wasting anything on me.

…pathetic… So fucking pathetic that you don’t need to bother wasting anything on me.

(Source: weheartit.com, via 84daychallenge)

— 1 month ago with 37060 notes
AISH AISH AISH LOOK LOOK LOOK

AISH AISH AISH LOOK LOOK LOOK

— 1 month ago with 4 notes
Anonymous asked: who are you goin to prom with?


Answer:

Gaur, but only as friends.

— 1 month ago with 1 note
aish-aear asked: *sniff sniff* my baby. going to prom. *sniff sniff*


Answer:

IN A SIZE SMALL DRESS!!!!!

— 1 month ago with 1 note